I'm 15, confused, depressed, and I need YOUR best advice. Help?

We've been together for fourteen months, but around the time we were celebrating our 10 month anniversary, I was getting closer to someone else and now I have seriously messed things up. I have confused myself and I don't know who I want more. I feel so ridiculous. I'm simply 15 but I will go crazy if I see either guy with someone else. What makes this so hard is that with the new guy I have somewhat of a bond with him and we are very close spiritually and emotionally, but with my boyfriend of over a year we can talk about anything, whereas with the new guy we don't have to talk; it's emotionally there.





I'm more comfortable in public with the new guy over my boyfriend.


In private, I'm more comfortable with my boyfriend. It's always been kind of weird to be with him in public...I feel horrible for saying that, but it's true.





The new guy is simply 1 1/2 years older than me, and my boyfriend is 3 1/2 years older...it's so hard on me. My boyfriend's friends seriously hate me because I seem ';immature'; to them, but that's a totally different story.





The point is, I'm afraid to start a new relationship because I might end up regretting what I gave up, but this new guy deserves at least a chance of us dating, but what if my boyfriend finds someone else?





I'm freakin 15...this shouldn't boggle me down this much...I'm 15, confused, depressed, and I need YOUR best advice. Help?
I was just in your situation at 16. It was my first relationship, and I really cared about my boyfriend. Here's my advice to you:





If you have feelings for the new guy, then you should break up with the boyfriend. Tell him things haven't been feeling quite right for you, and you want some time to sort things out. I know this really hurts and probably makes you feel really bad, but I promise it'll be okay. You're only fifteen and there will be so many more relationships in your lifetime.





After you break up, take some time to just be single and think about your feelings and what you want. It sounds to me like this new guy would be a better match for you, and you should give it a try once you take the time to move on from your relationship.





The truth is, if you're in a relationship and you start having serious feelings for someone else, then there's something missing in your current relationship and it's just not going to work out. This is your heart trying to tell you something, and you need to listen to it.





I tried hanging onto my boyfriend for months, instead of dating the new guy. My boyfriend and I eventually broke up anyways, because the truth is we just weren't right for each other. We're still good friends and hopefully it turns out just as happily for you. And the new guy? Well, I'm going to see him again this summer. I don't know how it's gonna go! Hopefully, whoever your new guy is, you're happy :)I'm 15, confused, depressed, and I need YOUR best advice. Help?
no it shouldn't but if you are serious about your boyfriend then the other guy needs to stay off your radar. you need to make up your mind and do it carefully think about it and donot do anything on impulse just slow down and think..growing up is hard work and never a easy path to take.. good luck
stay with your boyfriend. you've been together for this long, its normal to have feelings for other guys. the other guy could be anybody. thnk about it. you know more about your boyfriend than you do this other person. dont give up what you have. but hey thats my advice. do what you want.
ok so i was going to say something along the lines of your boyfriend sounds like a boyfriend and the other guy sounds like just a good friend





but wow 3 and a half years older... not such a big deal if you were older but wow.


go for the 16 yr old
Youre right,, youre 15. Odds are pretty good that youre not going to marry either of these guys. Dont take these things so seriously, youre just practicing for the real men girl. Just pick the one that makes you the happiest. Or hell keep them both lol
make a list of the pros and cons of each relationship or guy... look them over and consider everything... some one once told me, dont leave the one you love for the one you like cuz the one you like will leave you for the one they love!
GO TO BUNGIE.NET THE FLOOD FORUM
Just ask yourself if you still love your current boyfriend. that is the question. if you do, then you don't need to change a thing. If you don't then thats a different story.
You need to make a decision rather quickly because if eith one finds out, he might say something to the other one to start an argument. Then it will all be over-with both guys. Take my advice, hun Seriously
leaving a guy for anougher guy??


HORABLE


try to get more confertable with ur bf in public
go for another
i kinda have the same problem


but not exactly
Dear, u wud need to thnk wida clear head, study u problem 4m a neutral point of view, den u wud ve de answr, see u r on dat stage whr u nd 2 do wats rite ethically n nt de way u want it to be rite, u can nt leave ur boyfrnd alone in de midway, shud b thkful dat he treats u lyk a propah lady, dis new guy it seems only want physical stuff, which wud leave u damaged emotionally n physically, so my suggestion is u ve *** dis far, so bid de new guy gudbye n its absolutely wrng 4 u 2 cheat on ur boyfrnd, also how sure r u, dat even though u do decide 2 go ahead wid de new guy, n leave ur boyfrnd, dis new guy wud nt ditch u 4 anthr girl? so my vote goes 2 ur boyfrnd who has been devoted 2 u n wud neva hurt u emotionally.....
You are right...you shouldn't be bogged down. You have dated your current bf since you were 13 and a half? Where are your parents on this. You should just now be allowed to date and you have been dating since you were 13...no wonder all this confusion. I think at your age you should be dating all around..and not going exclusive with any one person...you are way to young for this commitment stuff. Free yourself up..and don't jump into another long term relationship. Keep yourself open.
Im going through a relationship problem like you now, so i understand what you are feeling (your 15, and im 14, so i do understand how you feel on this). the thing is with relationships you can never know whats going to work or not, but you dont want to risk what you already have. trust me i know how you feel, even though i may not be able to fully understand your true feelings; in my case... im basicly dating one of my best friends ex's who where very close, and the weird thing is, the girl and i both really like eachother (possibly even love). we are both really unsure since we both have mixed feelings because of my friend (who is unaware) and our friends who are pressuring us, some supportive some not.. but those who are not get to me more... i basicly hate myself now... i want to be with her, but i dont want to hurt my friend...





in this situation, similar to yours the only rational thing to do is to talk to the ones in question (your current bf, and possible the other guy) and discuss how you feel. honestly, both of them seem to like you (exactly how much, is unknown by me), and if they truley do, they both will only want you to be happy. mainly, by just talking, you can learn alot about yourself and those you talk to. i know this may not solve the problem, but its the best thing you can do. you need to decide what you truley want. if possible, i know its hard, ignore those who try to shut you down, and do what makes you happy. just know that small things are not sufficant reason not to care for someone, though you like one thing, you may find something that you despise/dislike.





im very sorry for all the above confusion, but its all i can say right now, as i am talking from fresh pain/hurt and feel like im dying inside myself from all this.





i honestly hope that this does help you a little. i wish you nothing but the best of luck with this and all of your problems.





- T.J.R.
The liklihood of you ending up with either of these guys is slim.





You need to figure out why you feel more comfortable with each guy. Is one better looking than the other. Is one immature. Is one more shy.





Feelings change.





Have you told either of these guys about the other one?





Whether you say anything or not, there is a vibe you will give out if you have been cheating (even if nothing physical has happened). Relationships that start out this way, rarely end well. Generally if you are with someone else and you start seeing someone new, the someone new may think that it is okay to be with someone else at the same time as being with you, and not tell you about it.





My advice, which I doubt you will take, is to make a clean break from both the guys. Neither of them are right for you.
I have had this problem before, and I didn't end up marrying either of them, but that was a choice I made. First of all, you are only 15 so chances are that you will end up meeting other guys and probably forgetting about one or both of these guys. However, this new relationship will always seem great at first because it is new; so you should keep that in mind. There are other questions that arise though: Does this new guy know that you have a boyfriend?





I wouldn't care much about what your bf's friends think about, guys can say something bad about you one minute, then try and talk to you behind their homeboy's back the next.





You can keep seeing them both, but if they find out can u handle what will happen next? If not, you need to straight up and tell one or both of them what is going. Personally I would tell the new guy ';i have a boyfriend, but we can still be friends';
hey girl! I remeber when I was 15, you really need to play the field and try not to tie yourself down to one person. you are young, dating right now will help you determine what you want in a husband later. I have dated a lot of jerks, being with different types of guys helps you realize how you really want to be treated and what you really deserve. I say tell them both you dont want a commitment and date both! why not, you know! have fun there is no need to be commited to one guy at your age. good luck with everything girl! :)
Relax and know that you are not the first person to be in this situation. Many have been in your shoes and have made it out just fine. You are saying the right things, you are only 15. You have the rest of your life ahead of you. Things happen, people change. You may or may not be in love with both of these guys. You are the only one that can make the decision on what to do. I would recommend you pick one, not my choice but it sounds like the new guy and you click just a little more, and go with it. In life we do many things we regret, as long as you learn from them and do not make the same mistake twice you will be fine.





Best of Luck,
haha 15 is when it most likely WILL boggle you down this much, sounds to me tho like you just need to suck it up and make a choice and stick with it, if you leave your boyfriend for this other guy then it was time for that relationship to end anyway and if he finds someone else then you'll just have to move on and focus on this new guy, if it doesn't work out with him and you've lost your original boyfriend as well (because this outcome is possible in situations like this) then again you will just have to move on knowing that you took a risk that didn't turn out the way you wanted, you won't have to have any regrets
You still have a long way to go girl unless you wanted to get married as early as sixteen..and could be a more terrible/confusing thing..





Let me ask you this...what was those things that caused you to like him before giving him your ';Yes';? And what do you think are those beautiful things your boyfriend saw in you the time he is courting you? During those months being with him, is there mutual responses that created a bond?Is there any reason why you are not comfortable being with your BF in Public?Historical reason? Physical?Do you want to keep him?





If your answer to my last question is a big ';YES'; then find ways to create a spark again (if there was). What was those things you do enjoy mutually (aside from sex,if you did). Outdoors?Hiking?Some activities that will help you both know each other...deeply.





If not?Well that's is also acceptable answer. Answers can only be YES or NO. If you dont have that mutual feeling (anymore)..let go of yourselves. The experiences in the stage you are in now is just a preparation for a more mature discernment on things like these.





As you have said, you are freakin 15...this shouldn't boggle you down that much. There could be reasons why you are more comfortable with the GUY. Is he physically more attractive than your BF? You said you feel that there is somewhat a bonding whenever youre with him even without talking? Can you know him better that way? Do you find him more better to be with?Just a reminder..communication is indespensable..





Dont commit anything by now now to the Guy. Go back to my questions and answer to the last one. Dont tell the guy to wait but you can still be a friend to him.





Hope this help..
Honestly, I would take a break from your boyfriend and see where things go with the new guy. I wouldn't take this advice too seriously, I'm just basing it off what you wrote. I'm in a similar situation. I've liked a girl for years now, but since she's a little out of my league I haven't gotten the courage to ask her out. I know I should probably move on, but I'm sooo afraid of never knowing what might have been. It's a tough decision to make, but make sure you choose the one your most comfortable with, no matter where you are. Good Luck!
Make two lists one for you boyfriend now with positive and negative things about him, and one for the new guy with positive and negative things about him...Compare and contrast.... Make a list about yourself and the things you like and dont like about you..See which guy fits in there better...Sometimes its better to see things on paper rather than in ur head...It makes it more visual...Always trust your head and your heart...Take chances when it feels right...
You are right, you shouldn't let it bother you that much, but if you are with one guy and liking another, then maybe its time you take a break from the first one, you are still so young and you have so much more time to look for the right one, and trust me, you will know. I know its hard and this is probably not what you want to hear, but trust me. don't cheat on your boyfriend with this guy because you could ruin and hurt him so much more then a simple break up and at first, yeah it may be hard, but think of how much harder it will be to explain to him if he finds out you cheated on him. also if you break up with him and find out you don't like the other guy and you still have strong feelings for your first, its much easier to explain to your ex then it would be after you cheated on him. think of how you would feel in his place. just let your first know you are confused and you need a break and continue talking as friends to both guys, after you get to know them more you will know which one you share interests with the most and it will all be clearer. please don't stress over this too much, go out with friends and stuff, don't revolve your life over this. it could only cause much more severe symptoms.





good luck %26lt;3
I usually don't even answer stuff like this, but this sounds like a similar situation to my friend, so here goes:





As you are only 15 currently dating someone who is 18/19ish I can see where the public thing becomes awkward (it can be a little taboo for the older guy). As for his friends, they likely think that because you are 3 years younger that you aren't as mature as them, and in all likelihood it's true. You are still growing and learning. At your age you shouldn't be so concerned.





As for the other gentleman, you say you have a spiritual connection. Usually it takes a lot of time to develop such a close connection with someone, and I fear that it may be the excitement of someone new in your life who is closer to your age. As you said yourself, you're more comfortable with your BF in private than the other guy, and yet the other guy is better when in public.





It comes don to this: talk to your current BF and express how you feel in public. Try and find out WHY it is uncomfortable in public and address it. If you can work something out then great, problem solved, you have the best of both worlds. It's not too late to develop a connection with him.





If you cannot work out those issues then wait. Give it a little time, just in case the excitement of the new guy wears off and you're left without anyone at all. If you do TRULY have feeling for him then accept the risk that you will be leaving you current relationship for ever and never returning.





As you said, you're 15, and this is the least of your worries. It'll all be a learning experience.





Good luck.
HES 18 OR 19???????????????





this is a mess.





you're a mess.





1: Drop both of them by saying you just want to be friends.





2: A ten month anniversary? NOT EVEN NEWLY MARRIED COUPLES CELEBRATE 10 MONTH ANNIVERSARIES... WTF?





3: So, you want to date the new guy, but have your boyfriend as a backup in case it doesn't work out? NO COMMENT ON THAT ONE...





4: If you're not comfortable with your boyfriend in public what does that say?...





5: Hang out with friends and work out (running and whatnot). Maintain friendship with these two guys, but don't let them get in the way of your life.





You're 15. These things shouldn't be your main concerns. I know dating is fun and all in high school, but you'll realize high school relationships are completely pointless once your out of high school and into college.