Whilst we were living together our relationship hit rock bottom, me ex had two major family events. the death of a family member and also finding out something else major.
We moved out about 3 weeks after these both events happened. and now she tells me the reason she has been so depressed over the past months is because she hasnt dealt with them.
So i kinda had decided that i wasnt going to go back because i didnt want to be hurt any more... but we're been hanging out at mates... and shes really putting in huge amounts of effort to kinda make it up to me if that makes sense. she tells me it wasnt anything to do with us and that she hit really is sorry that shes neglected me.
Ive been honest n said i dont know yet... but she says she will wait because she loves me.Should i take her back? 10 points for best advice!?
I kinda went through the same thing. Me and my guy were together for 2 years and we broke up a few times because he didnt really know what love was (his answer). The last time we broke up we were apart for 4-6 months...we dated other people and both had no luck. During being seperated he would lie and throw things in my face and such but for a while we had no communication. Then he started calling to check on our daughter and it kinda went from there. He would constantly tellin me that hed wait forever for me b/c I didnt know if I could handle him hurting me. But I came to the conclusion that Im not gonna be happy and I should give it one last shot. And we've been together for 3 months now and he has continued to make me happy and tries all the time to keep things alive and constantly amazes me. Ill spare you from the other drama but she seems to have changed... getting hurt wont kill ya....so- give her one last chance and tell her if it doesnt work this time, your done- and stick to it.Should i take her back? 10 points for best advice!?
you need to establish the facts that friends come first. trust me on this one. its good that u are being open like that.
i akways ask my self am i going to regret this?
and that line its better to have loved and lost, then never to have loved at all i dont think is true. its almost like if u are in a relationship and it ends bad then that stuff kinda stays with u.
i bet ur next relationship (with or without her) u will be even more cautious with everything. ull hold back on some secrets, not move in as soon. ugh it sucks.
then ask is this an abusive relationship? not just like hitting, but emotional. cuz emotional can be waay worse in some cases.
if u still aren't sure just give it time. dont have sex tho that would complicate it. but just say u two were meant to be then what is the rush? if u are going to be together forever it is important to be her friend first, like i said in the beginning
i know its hard to understand why she did what she did but im sure she was doing this thinking it was best for you at the time. the reason im sayin this is when my nan died from cancer i really tried 2 keep my relationship goin but the grief left me feelin so low and i started to notice i was takin it out on my bf so i couldnt bare to bring him dwn with me and decided to call things off. we got back together shortly after because he was sure he could handle it but with several issues from my past re-surfacing around then the pressure was to much. i think what your ex had to do was get through this on her own so as to come through a stronger person and without putting a burdon on you. maybe you should find out her reasons exactly as to why she did this so you can truly understand and see if this is something she is likly to do again. the only way through is to discuss what happened and what it is you are both hoping for in the mean time it would be good to keep the friendship so should you get back there is something to work on. if she is still having issues with the relatives death and other issue it may be worth getting her to go through some councelling as without dealing with this it comes back and it gets worse. im sure this was not done to hurt you. hope this helps
I think you should give her another chance, it might go right this time. She was suffering from depression, I hope she is better now. If she is, I think you two will have a good relationship. Just let her make it up to you.
wow she sounds really mature. here's the thing, when your going through something bad like a death in a family everyone deals with it in their own way. alot of the time we will take out anger and sadness out on the ones we love most. Your girl seems like she hit rock bottom, realized what was important and came back to it. I know you love her bc if you didnt then you wouldnt be worried about her hurting you again. If your afraid of getting hurt then your never going to take any chances in life bc failure is a reality in every aspect of life. Go to her and start fresh, dont bring past fights up and just enjoy one another. Good Luck!
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